Friday, January 30, 2009
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Oh Romeo.....
Taking a break from work to say.....Fuck men! lol no I'm not like that but I should be I've had the worst experience with men yet I stil cant be the bitter woman...I move on quickly and easily (well except for that one guy who broke my heart trampled on it, banged another woman on it...you get the point) but even Im still cordial with him. I guess I dont put men on a high pedestal so When they arent what I expected it doesnt hurt as much.
My aunt calls me the black widow...Im still not sure why, It's not like Im one of those girls that knows how to snag any guy she wants just to use him for what she cant get on her own. Im independent and I guess My dad has instilled some hard core values on what my prince charming should entail, and I just have not found him yet.
Im going through a very weird transition phase with a guy right now...I made some stupid decisions, got "caught up" and now I'm kinda lost in this situation...ahhhh...Its deeper then I'm letting on...I cry a lot, I'm not myself around him and I want to be able to grasp ME again ya know?
But you know what, I enjoy being alone and having fun with myself and my girls. My friend (a guy) was saying I need to date...its valuable in learning yourself and What kind of man you really want. Im gonna try dating but I've never been a good "dater" like every day of the weekend im out with a different guy??? I dont know....
Im soooo rambling on lol...sayin so much but not really saying anything so Im out
:)
My aunt calls me the black widow...Im still not sure why, It's not like Im one of those girls that knows how to snag any guy she wants just to use him for what she cant get on her own. Im independent and I guess My dad has instilled some hard core values on what my prince charming should entail, and I just have not found him yet.
Im going through a very weird transition phase with a guy right now...I made some stupid decisions, got "caught up" and now I'm kinda lost in this situation...ahhhh...Its deeper then I'm letting on...I cry a lot, I'm not myself around him and I want to be able to grasp ME again ya know?
But you know what, I enjoy being alone and having fun with myself and my girls. My friend (a guy) was saying I need to date...its valuable in learning yourself and What kind of man you really want. Im gonna try dating but I've never been a good "dater" like every day of the weekend im out with a different guy??? I dont know....
Im soooo rambling on lol...sayin so much but not really saying anything so Im out
:)
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Introspect
“you just weren’t memorable”
Those words are forever engraved in my mind…Its something that’s hard to swallow but I’m glad to know. Im taking a class with the vp of talent at fremantle(American ideol, price is rigt) and today was our first class…Basically I was told I’m good as a host..but just good not bad not great..that hurts but I know I have so much work to do to gain my true potential.
It got me to thinking though….being memorable.what makes a person memorable in a positive light ? we all remember the slutty drunk girl or the nerdy guy so nervous he threw up all over his courdoroy high waters…obviously we remember the conceited ones..but what does it take to combine the proper qualities to be…truly”memorable”
Hmmm….
Well for now all I can do is be myself..find myself even more and hone in all of my skills. I’m prepared for the criticism, the pain and the ultimate result. I was born for this
Those words are forever engraved in my mind…Its something that’s hard to swallow but I’m glad to know. Im taking a class with the vp of talent at fremantle(American ideol, price is rigt) and today was our first class…Basically I was told I’m good as a host..but just good not bad not great..that hurts but I know I have so much work to do to gain my true potential.
It got me to thinking though….being memorable.what makes a person memorable in a positive light ? we all remember the slutty drunk girl or the nerdy guy so nervous he threw up all over his courdoroy high waters…obviously we remember the conceited ones..but what does it take to combine the proper qualities to be…truly”memorable”
Hmmm….
Well for now all I can do is be myself..find myself even more and hone in all of my skills. I’m prepared for the criticism, the pain and the ultimate result. I was born for this
Sunday, January 4, 2009
California Dreams...
My mind has been getting cloudier and cloudier lately, I believe its from holding all my thoughts and emotions in...gettin kinda crowded up there so I have to release...why not do it on the infamous blogger.com. Im keeping this open to the public because In a way I AM an open book.
Remember xanga? (random) I met one of my bff on there, so Im definitely a fan of public blogging.
IM IN LA TRICK
Living the dream...you know, cheese sandwiches and sugar water but I can see the HOLLYWOOD sign from my window and that is all that matters right now.
I've been in La a little under 2 months now and It's been the realest yet most surreal experience of my life. I feel like everything I've gone through(good and bad) was all to prepare me for this very chapter of my life.
When I pulled up to my apt the first day here I was so excited, not scared at all which scared me, if that makes sense..I have always been atleast a bit hesitant about big decisions but this one? Just seemed right. So anyway, I've snagged an awesome job with MTV, not hosting but casting which can lead to the ultimate goal ya know! Ive gone to an amazing Hosting bootcamp with Marki Costello, I've auditioned for two soaps, I've been on The Game (cw) and CSI:NY...And Im really really excited to wake up everyday in sunny weather! :) Im so grateful and happy to have brought in the New Year in this town.
We'll talk about the more personal aspect of things at a later date lol
Remember xanga? (random) I met one of my bff on there, so Im definitely a fan of public blogging.
IM IN LA TRICK
Living the dream...you know, cheese sandwiches and sugar water but I can see the HOLLYWOOD sign from my window and that is all that matters right now.
I've been in La a little under 2 months now and It's been the realest yet most surreal experience of my life. I feel like everything I've gone through(good and bad) was all to prepare me for this very chapter of my life.
When I pulled up to my apt the first day here I was so excited, not scared at all which scared me, if that makes sense..I have always been atleast a bit hesitant about big decisions but this one? Just seemed right. So anyway, I've snagged an awesome job with MTV, not hosting but casting which can lead to the ultimate goal ya know! Ive gone to an amazing Hosting bootcamp with Marki Costello, I've auditioned for two soaps, I've been on The Game (cw) and CSI:NY...And Im really really excited to wake up everyday in sunny weather! :) Im so grateful and happy to have brought in the New Year in this town.
We'll talk about the more personal aspect of things at a later date lol
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